I've been keeping a text file log of this kind of thing for years.
Here's some of them, from most recent to least.
In #neochat:
<Evermore> This channel is like a big on-going firepit. You have to keep adding some fresh branches otherwise it dies.
<Blong> when it dies, we cook toph and eat him
<Blong> mmmm...roasted toph
In #toronto:
<Max34> I just finished reading Albert Speer's "Inside the third Reich". Y'know, Hitler wasn't such a bad guy,,,,just a bit crazy
<sully> If they say the USSR was evil, shouldn't they put in China as well?
<Mind_M35> of course if you wanted style, go for idi amin
<Mind_M35> max34 what part of genocide makes him "no such a bad guy"?
<sully> lol
<Seraphim> he's right, kinda...
<jbird> he had nice parades
<Max34> we won't get into that Mind
<Mind_M35> was he not such a bad guy when he switched from bullets in the back of the head to poison gas?
<sully> Hosted a pretty good Olympics?
<Seraphim> he started ut with some decent ideas...
<Seraphim> but he was a crazy bastich
<ineffable> oh you GOTTA give his kudos for the Olympics
<jbird> I prefer to give him props
<sully> lol
<Max34> he did try and rid us of the scourge of homosexuals and the like
<ineffable> welcome to #toronto, where we give Hitler props.
In #toronto:
<CASH4GRLS> Any Greedy Female College/Univ. Students in here want me to completely pay their for tuition?
In #toronto:
<CmokCmok> I'm really bad at saying no, and stuff.
<bordalone> so what part of toronto you live in?
In #neochat:
<sully> Feds might use Microsoft product for online ID: Forget about a national ID card. Instead, the federal government might use Microsoft's Passport technology to verify the online identity of America's citizens, federal employees and businesses, according to the White House technology czar.
<sully>
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/b ... ort18.html
<sully> SUCKS TO BE YOU GUYS!
<GL> bwahhahaha
<GL> hi I'm
paul12345678@hotmail.com
<sully> LOL
<WindoggNT> That would suck for the people that registered without this knowledge
<WindoggNT> Hi I am "SPANKMEHARDTHENPEEONME973349@MSN.PASSPORT.COM"
In #toronto:
<veggie> warning... facialmasters.com is not a beauty tip website
<Twentyfor> Haha.
In #toronto:
*** Jean-Luc (~gvfrfrbfr@CPE************.cpe.net.cable.rogers.com) has joined #toronto
<Jean-Luc> hi all
<sully> Welcome aboard captain
<Jean-Luc> lol... thanks...
In #w3b:
<Musashi> .haiku
<Miyamoto> I hate gay people
<Miyamoto> Folding chairs shall rule the earth
<Miyamoto> I am sick of this
<Musashi> that sucked
<yllus> What's the rule for haikus again?
<M3ph> and was a little homophobic too.
<yllus> lol Meph
In #neochat:
<Cranberry> I got a DVD player from my parents for my birthday.
<rickstah> i got a DA sander from her parents for her birthday
<rickstah> woohoo
<ArkAoss> I am in a reaaaallllly hello hello mood
<sully> DA?
<sully> lol
<rickstah> dual action
<Cranberry> It sands and gives blow jobs.
In #ot:
<Gamezilla> would you eat another mans balls...
<4TWOMP> a par of balls
<Gamezilla> while he's still alive
<4TWOMP> pair*
<Balddog> while they were still attached you mean?
<irresponsiblekid> ow
<Gamezilla> yes
<irresponsiblekid> eew
<4TWOMP> then they would have to gnaw off your hairy nutsack too
<sully> ROFL
<impreza_13> He have a strong heart? He a bleeder?
<Balddog> yep...no problem with that..id rip em off with my teeth
<Gamezilla> that is nasty
In #toronto:
<Mind_M35> the beatles are all dying off in order of artistic talent
<Molsen> i am sure faith hill stays in shape by working out all of the time
<Mind_M35> lennon, harrison
<sully> Who were the original 5?
<Mind_M35> i guess paul will be next
<Mind_M35> ringo will be kicking around til he's 120
<sully> LOL
In #toronto:
<tedfly> Join #guelph !!!!!!!!!!!! And feels how it looks like to be in a small and cold town!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
<tedfly> Join #guelph !!!!!!!!!!!! And feels how it looks like to be in a small and cold town!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In #toronto:
<mrs> ontariom the phone is for you
<sully> OntarioM is ~Ontario@CPE************.cpe.net.cable.rogers.com * Toronto Man
<sully> OntarioM on #toronto #phonesex #masturbation
<sully> Coincidence?
In #toronto:
<ChinaJade> sully looks like Enrique Igalasias
<sully> Great, I finally get compared to a celebrity and he's a virgin
In #neochat:
<sully> Maybe it's a scam
<Windogg> 8PM
<sully> Like when you see commercials about "going out of business" sales
<sully> That happen every month
<GL> if I ever owned a store I'd have a "Grand Opening - Going Out Of Business" sale
<Windogg> hahahaha
<sully> LOL
In #toronto:
<rickstah> i am cut
<rickstah> e
<sully> haha
In #neochat:
<Blong> sully has that smooth sexy suave persona
<mellypurr> bye babee
<Blong> kinda like valvoline
<sully> Plus I'm a guy
<sully> LOL
<Blong> sully is viscous
<mellypurr> LMAO
In #neochat:
<emostar> i forget who the blue chinese chick is but i can beat your ass wit her
<sully> Chun Li
<sully> You better not come near me with her if I'm Ryu
<Blong> chun li's flying blow job is the most lethal move in the game
<Blong> end of story
<sully> ROFL
In #neochat:
<sully> I don't do anything in showers
<ThisIzMel> ah hello
<skacewiz8> i like to lean on the wall
<Blong> showers are relaxation time
<skacewiz8> when i shower
<skacewiz8> and let the water hit my shoulder
<Blong> leaning on the wall is the best
<ThisIzMel> me too skace
<Blong> skace, we should shower together
<sully> lol
<skacewiz8> .....
<ThisIzMel> and get married too
In #neochat:
<Cranberry> Georgia's idea of a snow crew is five rednecks, an old chevy, two cases of beer, and a bag of sand.
<sully> Instead of hiding indoors instead
<sully> LOL CRAN
<rickstah> therefore releasing themselves of the liability of having thousands of children stuck in schools having to feed them, etc,
<Cranberry> I'M SERIOUS!@
In #neochat:
<LD50> sorry, i'm allergic to metal
<eakers> hehe
<LD50> allergic
<LD50> no, i'm not really. but my friend is. he got a piercing with metal, he later died
<adulzzz> wtf
<sticky> hrmmm
<sticky> lol
<sticky> that sucks
<LD50> alright, he didn't die.... but he's allergic damnit, it exists
<sticky> hahahahhaha
<sully> lol
<sticky> hello
<libertine> LOL
In #neochat:
<stickyAFK> i am an office slut
<stickyAFK> omg
<stickyAFK> i have to quit my job
<sully> eh sharon?
<yeeny> well at least you have a job title
In #neochat:
<skacey> 3. never say "OH MOMMY" right in the middle of it
<Blong> hahah
<sully> ew
<Blong> unless she says "say my name!"
<skacey> LOL
<Blong> right, skace?
<skacey> no no
<skacey> wronhg!
In #toronto:
<sully> Question of the day is still:
<sully> "Have you ever said anything crazy or dirty during the heat of sex?"
<Riana`> I've heard....."I can't...the cat is watching us..."
In #neochat:
<toolgirl> who says i ahsould go to bed?
<skacey> not i
<thirdkind> can i see your boobs?
<toolgirl> youve seen em
<skacey> hrmmm?
<thirdkind> that pic is blurry
<toolgirl> i dont' care
<skacey> lol
<karen`> tg get thee to bed!
<sully> lol
<thirdkind> might as well go to bed then
In #toronto:
<DB2> hey people
<DB2> anyone know what clubs are good tonight other than Helium?
<TCWeasel> Hydrogen isn't bad, Argon isn't as good.
<DB2> funny guy
<sully> hahaha
<TCWeasel> Yep. I'm a gas.
In #toronto:
<Ballerina> #Biteengirls looks like "Bite en girls"
In #toronto:
<Nemesis_> Do away with education altogether and just start lifelong apprenticeship programs
<sully> woo Nem
<Nemesis_> Pre-determined after some basic schooling.
<Nemesis_>
<sully> I wanna be a smithy
<Attila1> the Soviet Union tried that for 50 years
<Nemesis_> Yah... it sounds familiar
<Attila1> all they got out of it was decent vodka
<Nemesis_> Hahaha
<amayazon> lol
<sully> LOL
In #toronto:
<Attila1> i heard Sony was gonna buy Home Depot, IBM and AT&T
<Attila1> the company would be called Sony Home International Technologies
*** Milica (montana@142.204.**.**) has joined #toronto
<Attila1> or S.H.I.T.
<sully> LOL
<veggie> lol
In #toronto:
<indio> looking for MAYAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*** `XooBee` (
grrr@dialin-135-101.hamilton.primus.ca) has left #toronto
<Mind_M35> china darling
*** Amosketo^ sets mode: +l 98
<indio> looking for MAYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*** michael22 (~a@cr******-b.ktchnr1.on.wave.home.com) has left #toronto
<Seraphim> no maya's here obviously.
<Mind_M35> maya is a great ride
*** _Chantel (_Chantel@cr******-a.nmkt1.on.wave.home.com) Quit (Ping timeout)
<indio> what do you mean bye a great ride?
*** Amosketo^ sets mode: +l 96
*** Evil_Grin (Evil_Grin@cr*******-a.shprd1.on.wave.home.com) Quit
* Mind_M35 swivels his hips
<sully> LOL!!
In #neochat:
<Blong> does pink floyd rock anyone else's nuts?
<Blong> or is just mine?
<thirdkind> no
<hzl> I don't have nuts.
<thirdkind> they put me to sleep
In #toronto:
<Phovos> I picked up a new book today...
<Kica> lol Nitro. I would'nt want to kill you
<Phovos> The War Amp's Kama Sutra.
<sully> LOL PHOVOS
<Kailey> LMAO!
In #toronto:
<TCWeasel> I wanna be the maid of honour!
<sully> lol
<Chieko> you can be the organist
<Chieko>
<sully> "I have dual citizenship" "YOU'RE HIRED!"
*** Sheep sets mode: +l 98
<Chieko> lol
<michael21> i have triple citizenship
<Chieko> just show a pic of your bride
<TCWeasel> You're suggesting that I'm good at playing with organs, aren't you?
In #toronto:
<ChRiZtInE> im going to be 20 soon so u wanna fock me!!!
<ChRiZtInE> welll..... i know any kinds of positions!
<ChRiZtInE> so who wanna fock a 19 going 20 yrs old gal
In #toronto:
<Astro-WRK> he threatened to kill me at the next GT
*** Sheep sets mode: -b *!*@HSE-Toronto-ppp******.sympatico.ca
*** CyberMike (cybermike@217.10.***.**) has left #toronto
<Attila1> that's worth showing up for
<^Hipoint^> kewl....
<sully> LOL
<Cranberry> haha
In #toronto:
<Baby_dol> rats balls ARE very gross looking
<^Nitro> It's funny that all the females check out the rats balls
<Baby_dol> it looks like a tumor or something
<yllus> yeah
<yllus> sheesh
<yllus> No thanks dolly
<yllus> lol
<SunnyinFL> I should stop by and say.. "sir, may I please look at that rat's balls?"
In #neochat:
<Windogg> Alright guys, lesson of the day
<Tanner> women are the devil
<Windogg> "how to get Free Laundry"
<Tanner> don't need them
<Evermore> yeah, boys are more fun.
<Evermore> and we do laundry better
<Chris`> lol@ Evermore
<Windogg> When you do your girlfriend's laundry....
<Windogg> Dump every color into the wash and hit it on "HOT"
In #toronto:
<Mind_M34> i have a vibrating men
<Mind_M34> pen
<Sean__> men?
<Mind_M34> pen
<Mind_M34> pen
<Sean__> men who vibrates?
<sully> LOL
<ChupaChup> mindy likes men.
<Sean__> LOL
In #toronto:
<sully> My pet snail has a sitcom
*** Sheep sets mode: +l 68
<Slowhand> What's it called?
<sully> "Hardcore pornography"
<Slowhand> 3rd Shell From the Sun?
<billygee> Snail Hand Luke
<sully> lol
<Nicholas_> lol
<Slowhand> lol
<Slowhand> The Good, the Bad and the Slugly
<sully> Guys will watch a show called "Hardcore pornography" all the way through just in case
* Slowhand rolls on the floor laughing
<sully> bahaha
In #toronto:
<veggie> when matthew was just learning to talk we were on the bus
<veggie> and he couldnt quite pronounce truck
<veggie> he pronounced it hello
<sully> back to work with you
<sully> LOL veggie
<veggie> so he looks out the bus window and says really loud...
<veggie> OH MOMMY BIG hello
<sully> LOL!
<veggie> hahaha
<veggie> BIG HUGE hello
<veggie> firetruck = firefuck
<veggie> dumptruck = dumpfuck
<veggie> etc..
In #toronto:
<`Yellow`> anyone know how to remove spray paint from leather ?
In #neochat:
<Colleen> yeah, what about shrinkage, is it real?
<Colleen> my boobs dont shrink in cold water
